it's 7pm on 3.12.2004. a friday night. i'm walking down the aisle in jeans, in possibly the smallest wedding of all times, marrying david. small baptist country church. sunset. mountaintop beauty. my daughter, my mother, my sister. his father, his mother, his sister. the pastor, his wife. the two of us. the look in his eyes i'll never forget....
i'm awake now. my brother, derek called me to wish me happy anniversary. david has already texted me. he's working this morning. i stumbled into the kitchen to have what is possibly the strongest coffee ever (green mountain coffee-dark magic, for keurig. YUM). no cards, no flowers. i smile. finally he did what i said. not that i'm opposed to flowers or cards, but this year, i have such an ease about our anniversary, i don't feel the need to make it a grander day than what it should be. so weird for me, mrs queen of expectations. we're buying an outdoor grill and cooking out with our daughters. that's how we'll celebrate 7 years of hell, struggles, fights, joy, laughter, transformation, loyalty, love. and i'm okay with that. i think my brother summed up my words best when he said i "didn't need the reassurance" to make this day any more special than any others because i'm so content in my marriage. probably the first time in 7 years i am at rest with our faults, our differences, the fact that things will never be perfect, and those "butterflies" that i was so in love when we were first together...well, they're rare now, but when i still get them...wow. i know this love we share goes so much deeper than the excitement of a new relationship. we're somewhere in between settled and uncomfortable-ness, honeymooners, and those who's marriage stands the test of time.
who knows? next year i may demand that trip to tuscanny i've been dying to have. but for this year, happy 7th means food, sunshine, celebration with the girls, and love. lots and lots of love.
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